This week went by in a blur. On Friday, we went to our 12-week ultrasound which was insane. The baby was super active — flipping around, kicking its legs, etc. Everything looked good and healthy which made me realize, a little bit more, that this is really happening. Cue some anxiety and angst, especially when we went to Target to try to acclimate ourselves to baby gear and left disgusted by consumerism.
Physically, I have started to feel better. I have been more active and napping less, and was happy that I didn’t gain any weight in the last month because I was ravenous a lot of the time. But summer has helped with focusing on eating fruits and veggies. My mind feels a little settled too, like I am almost ready to go back to my daily stretching and meditation practices.
Okay, because I still can’t understand how pregnancy weeks work, this is dated at the start of my 11th week (I think…). I thought I would write short weekly synopses to document my experience.
This week I felt mostly fine. I got to spill the beans in person to one of my closest friends which felt really, really nice and we got to have a long conversation about parenting, pregnancy, birth, etc.
There were several nights where I slept 12 hours and then still needed a nap the next day. My workout motivation was looooow — I hit my walking goal every day but couldn’t get myself to yoga. Just felt very low-energy in general.
Emotionally, I started to feel a bit better and less irritable. I attribute it to fish oil in the forms of salmon, sardines, and capsules, but could have been something else too.
So…my two blog readers (Hey B! Hey R!) both already know this, but I am pregnant. Currently in week 10, though part of my brain has stopped understanding how weeks work since I’ve become immersed into pregnancy weeks. If your first birthday is technically celebrating the closing of your first year of life, is the 10th week of pregnancy celebrating the closing of the 10th week?
I have been feeling pretty ambivilant. I’ve written a fair amount about fertility anxiety here, so I was initially very thankful it happened naturally. Physically, I have been feeling almost fine. Just like a 80% version of myself most days, meaning instead of doing anything after work, I’m prone to just vegging out, very often laying down on my sofa half-listening to a podcast. I haven’t felt very nauseated (though did more so when it was earlier on), and haven’t felt very different overall.
Last week and this week, I have started to feel very emotionally grumpy. Just not really in the mood to interact with anyone, uncomfortable in all situations for all sorts of reasons (I don’t want to be wearing pants, something smells weird, I could be taking a nap right now instead of doing this). I mostly do not want to hang out with people.
I haven’t been thinking too much about the longer-term yet because when I do, I get very overwhelmed. But am trying to slowly break the news to more people, so thought this would be an easy start.